Let's just say up front that I am already not a fan of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. I think their approach is well-intended but way over the top. I think demolishing a functional house and throwing up a new one is stupid and wasteful (why not use that money to either remodel/fix up the place or find a new house more suited to the family's needs?). It bothers me that the makeover recipients often don't have the means and support to handle the downside of the changes to their lives, like higher property taxes due to their ballooning new digs, or unwanted aspects of celebrity status.
And finally, unlike seemingly most women in America, I do not swoon at the sight of Ty Pennington.
My sister had the opportunity to attend one of the reveals, and from all indications, much of the crowd was made up of semi-hysterical women hoping to catch a glimpse of Ty. Yeah, it was cool to see the family get their new house and yell "Move that bus!" and all, but Ty was wayyyy more scream-worthy.
Of course, nerd that I am, I'd be standing there assessing the construction details while screaming women are stampeding around me to see if they can get closer to Ty. But I digress.
Clearly, I don't think like a TV producer; such creatures are not known for practicality or unglamorous solutions. But after reading this article, there is no way on God's green earth I'll ever convert to EM:HE fandom. No way, no how.
I'm not sure which is more disturbing: the show being like a revivalist cult for its employees and devotees, or the revelation that Habitat for Humanity could build 24 new houses for needy people with the outlay required for one of these obscenely excessive makeovers.
The info on how they stage the show was fascinating in the context of all the reality TV out there - moments that look spontaneous are actually rehearsed and interviews with the subjects are the results of multiple takes. It's a little unsettling to get a glimpse of the man behind the curtain, and in some ways this type of information shatters certain illusions.
On the other hand, it helps to explain how these shows work, because certainly you wonder why everyone seems to be in sync and outside people never seem to interfere with the proceedings. How come votes on Survivor usually only split two ways instead of being all over the map? How come you never see people (ticket agents, taxi drivers, etc.) encountered by The Amazing Race contestants acting all star-struck or being shocked by their first encounter with each team and its camera-crew entourage? How come tasks on The Apprentice never get derailed by star-seeking bystanders, and everyone goes straight to their seemingly-random seats in the Boardroom instead of bumbling around like normal people?
I guess now I know that if I ever get on House Hunters, my true remarks will end up rescripted.
Real statement: "Why the hell would you ever put wall-to-wall over these nice floors?"
TV statement: "Well, it's a nice carpet, but it would have to go!"
Real statement: "Are these people f---ing colorblind? Why would you ever paint your living room magenta?"
TV statement: "Whoa, now that's a different color. It's not really me, though."
Real statement: "Mirrored closet doors. Again. Does EVERY damn house on this show have mirrored closet doors? Can we pleeeease go see a house without them?"
TV statement: "This bedroom is a nice size. Wow, those mirrors really brighten things up in here!"
Real statement: "Wow, this tacky 1970s wallpaper is awesome. Awesome! Can we keep it?"
TV statement: "Hey, look at that! Ha ha. Interesting. But we'll need to strip that and repaint."
Real statement: "Check out this closet! It's bigger than all the closets in my current house combined!"
TV statement: "It's a very nice closet, but I actually was looking for something a little bigger. And the master bathroom only has one sink."
And finally, unlike seemingly most women in America, I do not swoon at the sight of Ty Pennington.
My sister had the opportunity to attend one of the reveals, and from all indications, much of the crowd was made up of semi-hysterical women hoping to catch a glimpse of Ty. Yeah, it was cool to see the family get their new house and yell "Move that bus!" and all, but Ty was wayyyy more scream-worthy.
Of course, nerd that I am, I'd be standing there assessing the construction details while screaming women are stampeding around me to see if they can get closer to Ty. But I digress.
Clearly, I don't think like a TV producer; such creatures are not known for practicality or unglamorous solutions. But after reading this article, there is no way on God's green earth I'll ever convert to EM:HE fandom. No way, no how.
I'm not sure which is more disturbing: the show being like a revivalist cult for its employees and devotees, or the revelation that Habitat for Humanity could build 24 new houses for needy people with the outlay required for one of these obscenely excessive makeovers.
The info on how they stage the show was fascinating in the context of all the reality TV out there - moments that look spontaneous are actually rehearsed and interviews with the subjects are the results of multiple takes. It's a little unsettling to get a glimpse of the man behind the curtain, and in some ways this type of information shatters certain illusions.
On the other hand, it helps to explain how these shows work, because certainly you wonder why everyone seems to be in sync and outside people never seem to interfere with the proceedings. How come votes on Survivor usually only split two ways instead of being all over the map? How come you never see people (ticket agents, taxi drivers, etc.) encountered by The Amazing Race contestants acting all star-struck or being shocked by their first encounter with each team and its camera-crew entourage? How come tasks on The Apprentice never get derailed by star-seeking bystanders, and everyone goes straight to their seemingly-random seats in the Boardroom instead of bumbling around like normal people?
I guess now I know that if I ever get on House Hunters, my true remarks will end up rescripted.
Real statement: "Why the hell would you ever put wall-to-wall over these nice floors?"
TV statement: "Well, it's a nice carpet, but it would have to go!"
Real statement: "Are these people f---ing colorblind? Why would you ever paint your living room magenta?"
TV statement: "Whoa, now that's a different color. It's not really me, though."
Real statement: "Mirrored closet doors. Again. Does EVERY damn house on this show have mirrored closet doors? Can we pleeeease go see a house without them?"
TV statement: "This bedroom is a nice size. Wow, those mirrors really brighten things up in here!"
Real statement: "Wow, this tacky 1970s wallpaper is awesome. Awesome! Can we keep it?"
TV statement: "Hey, look at that! Ha ha. Interesting. But we'll need to strip that and repaint."
Real statement: "Check out this closet! It's bigger than all the closets in my current house combined!"
TV statement: "It's a very nice closet, but I actually was looking for something a little bigger. And the master bathroom only has one sink."
Posts
